Professor: "I have done brain surgery on mice, a little known fact."

Student presenter: "Can we begin?"
Professor: "I don't know, ask Kristin [Mulderig]."

Professor: "Your gut is valuable."

Professor: I have a magic meatball...

Jenny B: I don't mind being manipulated sometimes.

Professor: "What's the difference between me and a normal person?"

Bobby: "A lot."

Professor: Derivatives are stinky.

Oliver: "I hate your sister's haircut."
Amanda: "You don't know my sister"
Oliver: "I dated your sister"
Amanda: "She's 11.."

Emily C: You were green so I could do it!

Professor: "If it comes down to he-said she-said it's always she-said."

Leli: Luckily God has to deal with that... unless we're in the red...

Andrew N: I have a grey hair right here (points to his head). Wait, maybe it's right here (points to the other side of his head). No, it's here (points to the first side), but it's new and I'm sure it's because of this semester!!

Char to Mo: "You have the perfect sexy sax man body!"

Karla: (Ben thinks I look mischievous so I told him) "My nickname when I was little was Punky Brewster."

Ben: "Mine was corn dog"

Student: "Do you have construct validity?"
Professor: "I don't know what that is?"

Andrew N: Be like the frog . . . stuck in a pot.  Churning milk into butter.

Nasa: "Even 'awareness' is spelled wrong! Dangit, Camden, are you American?!?"

Nasa: "I'm sorry, Camden, but you have really small ears."

Professor: When I saw all those pretty Mormon girls I knew the church was true!

Liz: "It's the one with the Beatles!"
Camden: "A Bug's Life?!"
Lynsey: ..."Yellow Submarine?"

Bobby:  So I have been reading this book, Eichmann in Jerusalem...
Professor:  You mean this book that I have right here.....  Suck up.
Bobby:  I don't want to comment anymore.... and my cover looks better.

Erin P: That was a potent pickle... more potent than usual!

Camden: "The world may be our campus, but the Tanner is our world."

While reading her ethics book report book Laura R: "This book stinks!......Like it smells.....like an old basement."

Professor: ‎"If everyone lived their facebook lives, everyone would be really cool."

Dr. A: "I just had a brain cramp! That was as bad as Rick Perry!" (When he forgot a student's name)

Nasa (in the atrium of the Tanner): "Orange Balls!!!!!!"

"You guys have 10 minutes."  Nasa
"I've got a knife."  Nick Baker
"I've got a firework."  Amanda

Lane: "Excuse me, neighbor.  The internet that I am stealing from you isn't working.  Can you reset your modem please?  I'm having a hard time."

Emily to Oliver: She doesn't want your face...

Jenny K: She just wants your body.

When planning post graduation trips:
Cecily:  We should go to Rome.
Leli:  I think Florence is better....no wait I mean Austria.

Erin V: Howard Keel is the epitome of masculine dream boat.

Erin P: No points for virtue ethics!! (Followed by a thumb across the throat gesture with a gruesome sound...)

Michael A: Why don't we just do the test on monkeys... they are our ancestors!

Jenny B: The moment I understood Niels Bohr I realized I could fall of this chair at any moment!  ..... I could!

Professor: When you use that crowbar appropriately it'll do good things for you... if you use it to hit somebody over the head it won't!

Jared H: If you wear a suit in Parowan they'll think you're a doctor.

Professor: In our world of technology that nobody understands but we all play with....

Shelly: Tooele? Is that an Indian tribe?

Shelly: My first level of Hell is boredom. My second level of Hell is ambiguity...I'm in my second level of Hell right now.

(When talking about a transportation system from Eagle Mountain to SLC)
Dustin: Wait! I have the solution! We can enslave magical fairies!! It's low cost. They don't fight....they're very small.
Nick: They haven't unionized....as far as I know. They don't talk! Well, Tinkerbell just jingled.
Dustin: Not many people speak "jingle"

Andrew N: "Give me googledocs or give me death."

Professor: "I don't know why it works, but it does... Maybe Ben knows why it works."

Jason N: "I was stung [by a bee] as a child, but I wasn't a little baby about it."

Andrew: "No, I'm just a femme guy."

Steven: "Nothing wrong with that..."

Lauren: "I'm afraid of explosives."
Lane: "That's just because you haven't played with them."

Jenny B: "I might be an insurrectionist, but...."

Ben: I'm single!
Professor: Well...I'm married

Professor: A lot of the stuff you create in school has the life span of a fruit fly.

Leli to karla (in regards to Karla looking at Landsend.com a webiste her mom sent her, if you look at it you will understand):  "Eww! What are you doing?!... Eww! What are you doing!?" 

Kristin to Bobby: You need to be wearing more revealing clothes.

Bobby: The thing is that with guys, we're all just various stages of ugly. So girls can warm up.

 Bobby: I've long since become a girl...

Bobby: I look at Jeff's abs every day.

Professor: "Ok, let's get back to the obscenity..........................issue."

Professor: I'm going to keep using Rex as my date.

Erin P: I do love a good Mickey

Jared H: "Do you know what's really good for the common cold? GAS CHAMBERS!"

Josh to Bobby: I'm fine being a jerk as long as you realize you're one too.

Bobby:  One of the reasons I love this church is because they stand on moral ground.  The do the right thing saying "damn the consequences!"  Except they wouldn't really say that...

Char: "I was kinda wishing the creepy guy in the mustache would visit me for my birthday."

Professor: "So what is the size of the lake?"
Student: "25 acres."
Jared Hale: "That's a good skinny-dipping lake!"

Professor: "It's not always rainbows and sunshine"

Kate: BACK-STABBER-BURGER!!!!

Jason N to Amanda: "Can I set you up with my friend?  He doesn't wear pants."

(Not sure of the story behind this one... but I really want to know!)

Professor: I have socks big enough to hold that much money.
Student: (In the middle of a thought)...wait did you say sock?

Cameron:  I am training for a marathon
Kate: Which one?
Cameron: The Halloween Marathon
Kate: What are you dressing up as?
Cameron: Um...I thought I would dress up as a...runner.

Ben to Jenny: Come on Jenny, God will bless you with a husband if you do it.

Unknown: If cool is in the dictionary, then funner is a word.

Professor: "The daddy duck says, "QUACK QUACK QUACK!!!" (while clapping his hands) and they all came running back!"

Andrew N: I'm kind of like the devil in this whole situation.

Ben: "It's a good thing that managing a city isn't the same thing as putting cookies in the toaster" as he fanned the smoke from the lounge toaster.

Jennica: Andrew is the answer to pretty much anything.

Bobby: I think I have a much more nuanced approach to breaking the law.

Lauren:  How do I quantify the will of God?
Dr. A:  I would try a pairwise process.

Professor: "Adolphson Airlines, where I'm 95% confidant I can get you there alive!"

Professor: "I'm surprised that I wasn't out there with the dead sheep in the Tooele Valley with the nerve gas all around me."

Professor: "Don't tell me you guessed--pretend like you know it!"

Jenny K.: "The food was bazaar."

Ben: "How bazaar?"

Jenny K.: "We ate the spoon, that's how bazaar!"

Andrew H: If it feels right, do it!

Hugh: After being picked to comment in class, EVERYONE says, "I was just gonna say..."

Amy: "I have a feeling that people have a Neil Diamond relationship with the United Way. Either you love it or hate it."
Teresa: "I LOVE Neil Diamond. I'm not sure how I feel about United Way..."

Jenny B: But I don't like what my soul is! I want to be a better person!

Steven: "I do believe there was a time for unions, but times have changed.  I mean, blacks are allowed in schools!"

Char: "I want a quote up there..."

Bobby: "I kinda just want to hug Dr. Hart"

Mo: "It's like me having a heart to be a ninja, but not having the skills to be a ninja."

Warren: If you take the "outing" out of "scouting" all you have is "sc" and that's just no fun!

Professor: Jared speaks for sewers.

Bobby: I think I prefer cow solids to human solids.

Andrew: Isn't that what Elder What's-his-trash said?

Jeff, trying to understand city annexation laws: "So 'adjacent' is like holding hands and 'contiguous' is like spooning?"

Steven: They had a governor, his name was Pennypacker--that should set you off!

Bobby: I kinda just want to hug Dr. Hart.

Mo: That guy was perilously close to my kissing zone.

Bobby: You just gotta go all Bill Clinton on her.

Professor: I am boss.

Jennica: Poopy twine!

Professor: "What would the earth look like if everyone threw their trash out the window."

Amy Fisler: "Africa."

Andrew N. regarding his own quotes, "Apparently mine are too raunchy..."

Professor: "That's a technical term -- 'the jiggle point.'"

Professor: "I'm too much of an economist, that's why I eat a lot of pie."

Lauren: "I was a speechwriter for a politician. So naturally I think in terms of B.S."

Professor: "There is a runaway trolley about to run over 5 people..."
Bobby: "You can't use a trolley, that thing goes too slow. You just jump out of the way."
Jeff: "Yah... you just go 'ding ding'."

Matthias: "I could look at Carrie Underwood all day."

Professor: Essentiality is essential.

Tim: "The security guards there (at Sandia) make demontors look like nice people."

Matthias to Starlee: "Lets go to Havasupai... It's like Hawaii in America!"

Katherine to Chris: "My town is small and cute, just like you."

Ben to Karla: "Do you want to boop me?"

Professor: "Now that's a windfall for the day."

Nasa:"Anggita, you need to eat more. A wind will come by and blow you over."

Brittany to Ben: "A little too anxious to grab your zucchini there, huh?"

Professor: "Anything that has any complexity is very difficult."

Jenny: "You don't have a family yet."

Ben: "I PLAN ON HAVING ONE!!"

Hugh: "WWJD?"

Jenny: "What would Jenny do?"

Professor: "Money is really important to function."

Professor: "Too bad you're not an attendance quiz, James."

Professor: "Good food--uninterrupted--a major source of happiness for people."

Jennica: "I steamed Amy Grant's dress this summer... so you should all come talk to me."

Professor: "When you introduce a fuzzy objective to your decision problem of non-fuzzy objectives, your decision problem becomes fuzzified."

Katie B: When I meet all these awesome guys and girls I'm just like, "Marry my friend."

Jennica on the outrageous cost of the negotiations packet: "I’m pretty sure they made the pages with baby panda fur."

Professor: "Six months. I guarantee that all of you will be making $75,000 within the next six months. "

Teresa: "These are some real nice lips."

Chris to Leli: "We could go on one date and then have a tragic love story."

Jared: "Where are you from? You look like you could be Hawaiian or something..."
Claire: "Montana..."
Jared: "That's about as un-Hawaiian as you can get!"

Cecily: "Dreams are a liability in your job hunt."

Jared H: "I like thrill seeking behavior though..."

Regarding Camden B. sneaking his baby into a formal dinner, Nasa L. said,  "I can put your baby in my backpack and if anyone asks I'll say, 'Oh, that is my monkey pet just making noise.'"

Erin V: "No.... I want the gummies that are bad for me."

Talia: "Troy, you share the same birthday as my former hamster."

Anonymous: "I can't wait to go to ethics with Dr. Hartthrob."

Brett Noble: "If what they read in law school is anything like last nights reading, I don't want freaking anything to do with it!" (talking about Dr. Facer's reading)

Jennica to Oliver: "You are such an idiot! Who I love."

Ben: "I have an hour, what should I do with it?"

Laura R.: ""Go find someone to date."

Ben: "Did you see the email she sent me? It's completely unambiguous. Drop the class; date more!"

Professor: "Why don't people go live off in the woods in Montana..."

Ben Thurgood: "That's a great idea."

Professor: "...and send letter bombs to people."

Ben: "Uh, not that part."

Liz F to Nasa: "You swore at me in Mongolian?"

Mo: While setting up his Mac to run windows: "I just became a little baby Andrew Heiss today."

Jonathan Ward: "Whoa whoa whoa whoa...they are NOT going to make me use syllabus builder until December!"

Professor: "Debt is just like drugs, sex, and rock and roll. Fun in the right situations, but otherwise not so good."

Social Innovation

Jenny B at a Ballard Center Presentation: "It is really cool. They made food into dirt... and they ate the dirt.... No really, I saw them!"

Oh Ben...

Steve D. about Ben: "Ben will stick a lot of things in your head."

Right...

Ben to Starlee after the rafting trip: "Now you want me..."

Up-to-date

Professor: "I do use the texting."

Unethical?

Professor: "Don't go unibomber on me..."

Something Only Mo Would Do

Mo's answer to a test question in Aaron Miller's class. Be sure to see Pro. Miller's response at the end...

Watch out!

Jenny B to Ben: "I always have them in my backpack... You never know when you need to shoot somebody (with a water gun)."

Not a good idea...

Erin P. looking for relationship advice: "Hey, why am I talking to Oliver and Ben about this!?!"

Life Lessons

Professor: "By the way, those of you who listened to conference and aren't married or engaged, you know what's on your to-do list now right?"

Oliver: "But Elder Holland said that not all the talks will apply to everyone."

Leli: "But Oliver, that does apply to you."

Oliver: "Hey, I have a ring bought and a honeymoon planned. I'm just waiting for the right girl!"

Good question...

Jared H: "What is a word perfect?"

Such a Gentleman

Ben to Erin: "I'm going to put this up your nostril and poke your brain."

Right-O

Professor: "So really, you guys just need to start having kids, whether you're married or not."

Off track...

Professor: Hmm. "Macro" makes me think of macaroons. I love macaroons. They're coconutty and sweet. Anyway...

Married life...

Tim B.: "When you live in Wyview you gotta keep up with the Johnsons."

Cecily in reference to Oliver: "I think I actually knew a dog named Oliver once."

Good thing.

Oliver: "I am not sexist. But I do believe in gender, strongly."

So true

Dave: "Pretty much everyone just becomes a little ball of hate during their second semester."

Sometimes MPA students are creepy...

Oliver to Amy: "I can see inside you as a person."

That one holiday in March...

Thomas: "Oh. It's St. Patrick's Day! I had no idea. I was wondering why everyone was wearing UVU colors..."

Who knew?

Professor: "1.05 is the same as 2."

Double Take

Robert Downey Jr... Remind you of anyone?

How about this guy?

Uncanny resemblance isn't it?

Above and Beyond

What all presentations should be like... (click on link below)

The Career Development Cycle

What no one wanted to tell him...

Winn Claybaugh in reference to a professor's receding hairline: "You've just got to let go of it..."

Language Lesson

Bobby to Ruth: How do you say "quitter" in Portuguese?
Ruth: Bobby.

Good to know!

Professor: "I teach this stuff but I don't necessarily know anything."

Eh?

Professor: "And some of you are whatever hats."

Wikipedia

The last paragraph of Josh Rohatinsky's Wikipedia page:

Josh is currently back at BYU studying Public Administration. Three to four times a week, in the MPA break room, Josh participates in TPL (Trash Pig League), where he is currently atop the leaderboard with eight wins. Josh is a competitor and is quoted as saying that "playing in the TPL is more stressful than running in the NCAA championship." Josh has also compared his championship run in the TPL to the Chicago Bulls dynasty of the mid 1990s.

Slight exaggeration

Jeff (pulling out the most random and far-fetched number he possibly could, but for some reason still saying it and being serious about it) : "Those hospital helicopter rides are expensive - they're like $1 million each!"

Rulon (unsuccessfully trying to make Jeff not look stupid): "Yeah, they're pretty expensive...they're actually about $25,000 each, but still - expensive!"

Precious

Cecily: "The exclamation point makes it cute!"

Enchanting

Melissa Porter: ""Okay. I'm going to do the Giselle voice. I need a bird and a squirrel."

Very specific...

Professor: "Strutsy, you know...strutsy?  Like, she was strutsy.  I don't know, just think about the word!"

How to not fail a job interview...

Bobby: "Always wear a shirt, that's where I went wrong."

Effectivity

Bobby: Actually, I think there is a way to measure effctivity... Effectivity?